Mother Daughter Retreat: Year 6

This last week Gracie and I honored our tradition of the Mother-Daughter Retreat at Eco-Justice Center in Racine, WI that began when she was 6 years old! This was our 6th Year! (You can see the chronicle of our other years here.)

This year was by far our best yet.

As we drove out on Sunday night, I was feeling unsettled. I should be working. Gracie should be in school. It cost so much to care for our animals while we are away.

I didn't voice any of this to Gracie, but she was feeling it too. I miss home. I hope Izzy is ok in the kennel. Mom, I almost asked to go home, I feel like we need to be home.

We fell asleep Sunday night offering prayers for a peaceful retreat and care over our house and animals while we were away.

We woke up Monday morning feeling refreshed. Quickly, I realized something really important. Gracie rarely gets all of me. This was 36 hours we set aside to give to one another. I had no other distractions. It was just Gracie and I, a pile of art supplies, and a load of trails to be explored.

There are loved ones in our lives that deserve us, all of us. It is the gift of self. I have to be really, really intentional to do this....

*****

reunited with the swing!

These Guinea Hens followed us every where, I think they wanted to play soccer

At the start of the trail

We have our adventurin' boots on

we 💗💗💗 rocks

watercolor painting

there is nothing like conquering the tree stump

our watercolor creations

there was a fair amount of crocheting, ukulele playing, and singing

Because baptism...

"Mom, if you could go back and choose to live in any time in history, what time would you choose?"

Me: Hmmm... I don't know, I have never thought about it

I would go back to Jesus' time.

This was another car conversation. It was brief. This is an observation of Gracie's desire to grow in understanding. 

***

Last week marked two of my most favorite feast days. I am a person of superlatives, so that means, there are many feast days that are of great import to me. October 28, was our family's celebration of the 11 year anniversary of Gracie's adoption into the Body of Christ through Baptism. We typically mark this celebration by attending a one of the many beautiful historic churches in our Chicagoland area. 

The last few years Gracie has been very adamant that to mark this special day we go to Old St. Pat's downtown Chicago. It was a full weekend! She was away at camp for dance. Thank goodness Old St Pat's has an 8pm Sunday evening mass! 

***

November 1: Feast of All Saints

Beloved:See what love the Father has bestowed on usthat we may be called the children of God.

1 John 3: 1

***

At Mass for the Feast of All Saints, I was completely overcome. 

Gratitude

All of our Holy ancestors that have gone before us, laying the foundation, a road of holiness...

They answered their baptismal call to holiness, living a life set apart for Jesus.

*** 

It is easy to be overwhelmed by the lives of the Saints.  They are such extraordinary humans! Their holiness is unattainable!

In reality, a life of holiness is a response. We respond daily. Many times not even intentionally. The response to this love freely given to us - that we may be called Children of God - is one of acceptance and action. I accept that Jesus loves me beyond my wildest dreams. I act out of that love. 

***

 Gracie's Baptism Day

October 28, 2007

Basilica of the Sacred Heart, Notre Dame, Indiana

 Fr. Pat Gaffney and a naked baby... She was so mad!

She finally calmed down when given the Light of Christ

Gracie had quite a welcoming committee into the Body of Christ

Your Cosmic Task = The Body of Christ

"The laws governing the universe can be made interesting and wonderful to the child, more interesting even that things in themselves, and he begins to ask: What am I? What is the task of man in this wonderful universe? Do we merely live here for ourselves, or is there something more for us to do? Why do we struggle and fight? What is good and evil? Where will it all end?"

Maria Montessori, To Educate the Human Potential

A few weeks ago the Joliet Montessori Elementary & Adolescent communities held it's annual field study field trip. The students spend the day at a local forest preserve engaging in quadrant studies. This year in the afternoon the students were divided up into groups and given the task of building different kinds of shelters. This was a lesson in the Fundamental Needs of Humans. They were given a few guidelines: the shelter needs to be near fresh water and out of the way of the elements.

When I arrived to join for an evening potluck and bonfire I was met with a very excited Gracie: "Come and see our shelter! I want you to take a picture of it!"

So away we went tromping through the woods. 

 

I was completely impressed by the structure Gracie and her group built. Not only was it a super enticing hideout. (I wanted to bring my tarp, sleeping bag, and a book and snuggle in) But knowing that these students worked joyfully in chilly and damp conditions all day was admirable.

I asked Gracie, "tell me about your group."

She began rattling off names and telling me what each member of her group was good at. Then she interrupted herself, "you know? It was great! We were all good at different things! That's why we were able to accomplish so much."

"Wow! Gracie! That's an amazing discovery. That's how the Body of Christ works!"

With a big fat smile, she responds, "yep!"

Just Be

When was the last time you spent 24 hours of uninterrupted time with the one you love? Or one of the someones you love?

24 hours of uninterrupted time? It sounds ludicrous! How? When? This is not possible.

Humans in the 21st century - modern times - are skilled at filling every minute of the day with activity, obligation, tasks. And we are always struggling against the grind that we have set up for ourselves.

I find that I am always looking for a window out!

The window came this last week. Gracie was to be at camp for the week. The house is empty of interns and guest moms. I just needed to enlist a small army of people to care for the myriad of animals that live at Nativity House. (a house of hospitality not just for humans!)

Tuesday after work we jumped in Rosie (our red prius) and headed north to Racine, WI, Eco-Justice Center. It just so happened that we were there 7 years to-the-day! of our very first visit to their hermitage. Our treks to the one room cabin in the woods began as 24 hours or a full weekend - if we were lucky - to get away and prepare in prayer for the project that would become Nativity House. It has now become a whole family affair. Once or twice a year Justin and I go. Once or twice a year Gracie and I go.

This time Justin were blessed to have a full 48 hours of time away. We spent our time reading, hiking, exploring the southern Wisconsin coast, drawing, writing. It was time to just be in each other's presence. There was no elaborate plan, there wasn't non-stop deep conversation, it wasn't all about romance.

The task at hand was to  just be. 

On our jaunt up the coast of Lake Michigan coast we stumbled upon a brewery: St Francis Brewery. Yum!

we have to make time, take time, reclaim time

to just be in each other's presence

your spouse, your child, your mother, your father

Enamored by Life

I was walking a few steps behind my daughter and niece in Muir Woods National Monument and we were coming up on Cathedral Grove. There was a sign asking for a respectful silence when walking through. I heard Gracie, "shhhh. let's listen to the forest." Both girls paused and looked up. Ellia whispers, "wow, so big"

***

We had to wake up at 6 am to observe the tide pools. It was an early morning and not everyone in our party was excited about it. We treked down to the ocean at low tide, the reason for our early morning excursion. There we found an exposed reef were we could observe amazing sealife. At every turn Gracie and Peyton oohed and aaahed...

***

Justin, Gracie and I just got home from a 10 day jaunt in the San Francisco Bay area. We have a Wozniak Family tradition of annual family vacations. This year it was 7 adults and 5 children (ages 1-11.)

The theme for this year's family vacation: full.

On this vacation I found myself taking pause and catching my breath. There were so many moments of awe and wonder. Whether it be two children gasping in awe at entering the Cathedral of the Assumption in San Francisco, two children so excited to be holding a piece of the Golden Gate Bridge, 3 uncles joyfully kicking around the soccer ball with a rowdy bunch of kiddos, Grandma sharing her love of biology and eco-systems with her beloved grandchildren, laughter of playing cousins while we prepare dinner, the sense of smallness at observing 1000 year old trees...

The list goes on and on.

With a group of children ages 1-11 there were also many moments of chaotic hysteria. It's only natural. That is family life. We take it all. We make the most of it. We cherish the whole package.

I know these are graced moments.

***

We must practice being enamored by life.  It is imperative if we are to make it through the tough times.

Summer Goals

Summer: Week 1

At the beginning of summer I made a promise to myself that I was going to be more creative this summer. To help me along in this goal I purchased a few new shiny items: watercolors, art markers, a sketch pad and a pack of watercolor paper. I vowed that I would use up these items by the end of the summer.

The first week went very well. I created many different watercolor paintings and got underway on my art sketch journal.

As with many things that start with a mad flurry of activity, week 3 of summer the creating came to a dead halt.

***

10 days ago something new happened. I had a small accident of falling out of a pool. I have discovered that it takes real talent to fall out  of a pool rather than in. The fall resulted in a concussion.

I have learned so much over the last 10 days. I learned way more about concussions than ever. When you have a concussion any screen time at all strains your brain. I could actually feel the strain and I would fatigue almost instantly. I also learned that I am not an easy person to slow down. I know it's not a big surprise. A good friend of mine was recounting a story of struggle; she talked about how important struggle is in life because it helps us be more compassionate and empathetic. This last week has definitely helped me grow more in those areas.

So what is a person to do when screen time and reading books is a brain drain? Create! Little did I know that a week of brain recovery would lead to aiding in completing my summer goal. I spent two entire days just painting. And one of those days Gracie spent the entire day with me. And the real kicker? It was all out on my patio, under the umbrella, with Izzy warming my feet and a herd of goats and flock of chickens looking on.

inspiration ready

practicing faces

Mary is always close by

The Mary Garden, Milkweed, and a Precious Visitor

Gracie's Orange

Gracie's Color Study

A moth

A swallowtail

Leaving a Legacy: Part 1

A few weeks ago I traveled home to Houston, TX for a family wedding. It was a time that I will always treasure. 

I was given the gift of attending Mass with my Grandma. Two things happened at this Mass that had never happened before. 

• We got there early but because there were so many of the Hvizdos Clan attending this particular weekendwe would not fit in the usual pew. We ended up in a pew behind the priest and deacon's chairs. I was irritated. I did not want to stare at the back of their heads the whole Mass. But had we not sat there, I would have never saw what I saw. My Grandma has always served her parish as a Extraordinary Minister of the Eucharist.  At the appointed time she stood at the bottom step of the altar and received Jesus in the Eucharist. I witnessed it. Her posture, her eyes, her mouth, - her entire body was in full honor, devotion, and awe at what she was participating in. 

• My grandmother just so happened to be the Extraordinary Minister for our section. She served her family Jesus that morning. My aunt proclaimed what I was thinking, "That was the first time in all these years that Mom gave me the Eucharist."

But it wasn't. She has been serving Jesus to her loved ones  through her service as mom, wife and grandmother for years. There is no doubt that she prayed all of us through things we are even unaware of. She has left a mark. 

It was no coincidence that at the wedding the night before, Jesus was there - in my aunts and uncles, in my cousins, in their spouses, in their children. I was overcome by His presence. 

***

I would be amiss, if I painted my family as emblems of Christian perfection.  We have all struggled over the years and will continue to do so - and at times those struggles have been with each other. EEK!

I hear the words of Pope Francis from Gaudete et Exsultate echoing in my heart, (actually the words of the New Zealand Bishops as quoted by Pope Francis)

 “His love set no limits and, once given, was never taken back. It was unconditional and remained faithful. To love like that is not easy because we are often so weak. But just to try to love as Christ loved us shows that Christ shares his own risen life with us. In this way, our lives demonstrate his power at work – even in the midst of human weakness” (18)

 ***

We just have to be willing to try to love as Christ loves! And he will use us even in spite of our weaknesses!

My grandparents over the years, in spite of their weaknesses, instilled a rich love of God and neighbor in their kids and grand kids. Over the years, they have nurtured a legacy of love and faith.

I will do my best to continue the legacy.

Granny Rita - 91 years young

Grandma Gerrie - taken graveside of Grandpa Frank to so honor him on Father's Day

The Spiritual Life of Parenting - Episode 35

Car talk. On becoming.

That's where Gracie has her deep thoughts.

It's where I get the privilege of hearing the inner musings of her heart and soul. And when I say privilege, I mean it. As she gets older, I don't always get the candidness that I did when she was younger. Being privy to her inmost thoughts is a window into her spiritual life. 

We were talking about adoration and imitation that happens in friendship.

V: This relationship is similar to you and your cousin. She wants to BE you! 

(I said this tongue and cheek, I generally speak in hyperbole)

G: Wait, isn't it a sin to want to be someone else. You need to be who God wants you to be not someone else.

Mic drop.

***

So much of life is spent searching for meaning. So much of parenting is helping our children become who they are called to be. 

Who are they called to be?

This is an easy question to get all uptight about.  I can feel the anxiety mounting. She needs to be successful, she needs to be able to afford to live, she needs to get a good job, she needs to be happy with her choices.

My child has a calling.  I have no idea what that calling is.  My vocation is to ensure that she knows she has been dedicated as a Child of God. That means that sometimes my love for her needs to be ferocious - my child is precious child of God and no one will compromise that. Sometimes it means I need to be ferocious with her, you are a precious child of God and that behavior does not mirror your giftedness. 

Sometimes, most of the time, it's patience and gentleness that are needed as I watch the Child of God that is Gracie unfold. 

***

As parents our job is create fertile soil in our children so that they can grow into who God is calling them to be - so that they can, as Catherine of Siena put it, be who God called them to be to be so they can set the world on fire!

Spiritual Life of Parenting - Episode 1