I love being Catholic. I am not sure how, but from an early early age I have had a profound love for the faith.
When I was five I remember being at church with my mom. There was a family of four, the daughters were small - I perceived that they must be my age - and they were receiving the Eucharist. I was distraught. Why could they get it and I couldn't. I asked my mom. My parents did what they could to get me into Catholic school for my first grade year.
That was the beginning of my cognizant faith journey. For many years after my first Eucharist, I took notes at mass, so that I could pay better attention. I was very active in youth group. I went off to college sure that I was going to be the coolest singing youth minister EVAR!.
I learned a lot in college. My Catholic World got much bigger. I learned that there is so much more to my faith than dropping a class over the use of inclusive language (which I did) A few years after that I did a volunteer year through the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. They warned me with their slogan Ruined for Life. That was 11 years ago.
I continue to struggle with that ruined-ness. Thank goodness my husband was also ruined or I would find it to be a lonely struggle. What does ruined mean? It started out as a challenge of the call to serve the poor and an awakening to the parts of the system that perpetuate poverty, ignorance and hatred. Most recently in my faith journey, it is about striking a balance between orthodoxy of faith and the Gospel-call of love in action. It is easy to fall to one side or the other and become wary of the other side. Even popular society has sought to divide the two - you know social justice is socialism or pro-life catholics are out of touch with poverty issues.
I strive to be in the middle of all that. I feel that I am called act justly and walk humbly with God. I can't really divide the two. I recently stumbled on a book- not a new book, it's been around for a while- called Following Christ in a Consumer Society by John F. Kavanaugh. The preface is all about this balance. I only got that far because I was so taken aback. It was the first time that I read of a theologian addressing the issue. Below you will find the first paragraph of the book. I am going to read the whole book now. I am wondering if there is anyone out there who wants to read it with me. I am going to post on the first chapter in about a month. I am also going to have a formal book group meeting at my house so if you are in the area and are interested let me know.
I write for two quite disparate groups, who share, if little else, the wholeheartedness of their diverse commitments to either social justice or the life of faith. I am especially writing for those who, while committed to faith or justice, have acknowledged and admitted a need for something to either embody their faith or sustain their passion for equity. In the past few years, I have been privileged by friendships with both kinds of persons. I have seen many priests and nuns committed to work in city ghettos, having lost their sense of faith or prayer, soon lose their passion for the poor. I have talked with married couples clinging to their faith, struggling to ward off a loss of passion for each other and for life. And I continue to dream of bringing together radicalized Christians who seek the support of a profound faith with intensely orthodox believers who seek to give their faith a concrete historical impact. Fideists and activists need each other to be whole. They need each other even to be who they are.
March 15, 1986 * St. Charles Borromeo, Houston, TX |
That was the beginning of my cognizant faith journey. For many years after my first Eucharist, I took notes at mass, so that I could pay better attention. I was very active in youth group. I went off to college sure that I was going to be the coolest singing youth minister EVAR!.
I learned a lot in college. My Catholic World got much bigger. I learned that there is so much more to my faith than dropping a class over the use of inclusive language (which I did) A few years after that I did a volunteer year through the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. They warned me with their slogan Ruined for Life. That was 11 years ago.
I continue to struggle with that ruined-ness. Thank goodness my husband was also ruined or I would find it to be a lonely struggle. What does ruined mean? It started out as a challenge of the call to serve the poor and an awakening to the parts of the system that perpetuate poverty, ignorance and hatred. Most recently in my faith journey, it is about striking a balance between orthodoxy of faith and the Gospel-call of love in action. It is easy to fall to one side or the other and become wary of the other side. Even popular society has sought to divide the two - you know social justice is socialism or pro-life catholics are out of touch with poverty issues.
I strive to be in the middle of all that. I feel that I am called act justly and walk humbly with God. I can't really divide the two. I recently stumbled on a book- not a new book, it's been around for a while- called Following Christ in a Consumer Society by John F. Kavanaugh. The preface is all about this balance. I only got that far because I was so taken aback. It was the first time that I read of a theologian addressing the issue. Below you will find the first paragraph of the book. I am going to read the whole book now. I am wondering if there is anyone out there who wants to read it with me. I am going to post on the first chapter in about a month. I am also going to have a formal book group meeting at my house so if you are in the area and are interested let me know.
I write for two quite disparate groups, who share, if little else, the wholeheartedness of their diverse commitments to either social justice or the life of faith. I am especially writing for those who, while committed to faith or justice, have acknowledged and admitted a need for something to either embody their faith or sustain their passion for equity. In the past few years, I have been privileged by friendships with both kinds of persons. I have seen many priests and nuns committed to work in city ghettos, having lost their sense of faith or prayer, soon lose their passion for the poor. I have talked with married couples clinging to their faith, struggling to ward off a loss of passion for each other and for life. And I continue to dream of bringing together radicalized Christians who seek the support of a profound faith with intensely orthodox believers who seek to give their faith a concrete historical impact. Fideists and activists need each other to be whole. They need each other even to be who they are.
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